NAS: What Is a Date?

“What Is a Date? How do you define “going on a date” with a man versus “hanging out” with him or “talking” with him?”

This topic was inspired by Arleen Spenceley’s recent date definition post:

The time has once again arrived! It’s Tuesday, which means linking up with the lovely ladies of NAS. Since the definition of dating is as vast as personalities, I look forward to reading others’ posts on this prompt. Because I feel called toward the vocation of marriage, I’ve thought a lot about this topic. So, prior to having a child I only thought of a “date” as a time in which a couple who were mutually interested in each other got together to do some type of activity like watching a movie, going for a walk, or whatever they both found agreeable. I have learned however, a date can be as casual or serious as interpretations allow. I say this because kiddos often get together for play dates where they are seeking to enjoy each other’s company and have lots of fun playing which is their mutual activity of interest. This can also be extended to ladies and gents as well. When a woman is trying to decide whom to exclusively date, she could engage in Casual dates, which could involve many guys. That rather sounds scandalous which is not my intent. smile

For me, a casual date is going out with a guy who has the same idea of the time spend together. We are both working to get to know each other and if it is serious dating, we are working to discern whether we are called to marriage. I have never been a casual dater; when I have been in relationships, I take them quite seriously, so I could use a lesson or two about casual dating. Now, I am not saying casual daters do not take their time seriously because that is far from the truth. I guess I’m saying since I have a tendency to get emotionally attached to the men I’ve dated, and have not protected my heart, when the eventual break-up comes crashing down, I am unsure if casual dating would work for me. I also am at a stage, especially having a child who is most important in my life, that I am looking for commitment and long-term friendship with the man I date. If it is God’s will, I pray my next relationship has a different ending than the past, however, if I had not have break-ups then I may not have learned and been open to all the wisdom I receive from my lovely single friends.

Since I could ramble on and on about areas I struggle with when initiating dates, I’ll save those thoughts for another post. 🙂 What do you think? How would you answer this prompt?

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Until next time,



One thought on “NAS: What Is a Date?

  1. I’m not sure how I feel about casual dating, either. I definitely believe you can be going on one-on-one dates with several different men at once, but *only* if they all know about it. I have no idea how to start that conversation, though, and it’s never been an issue for me.

    That’s how it worked back in the day, from what I hear: you could go on a date with Billy on Friday and Tommy on Saturday and Ricky the next Friday. Then, when one of them asked to “go steady,” you wouldn’t go out with anyone else anymore. Maybe that’s what made it casual. It was a casual dating climate, not just casual “weather” for one couple.


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